Relationships & Jesus

​Let me first off start out by saying, I’m NOT an expert on relationships. I am writing this post based off the words God has given to me and what I believe, have been taught, and have seen in my parents and grandparents.
 
There are many different types of relationships. There are relationships in dating, marriage, friendship, etc.
 
In this post we are talking about dating and marriage and where God comes to play.
 
I’m a senior at a state university and needless to say, my views and my faith is not the norm.
 
Like I said previously I’m NOT an expert and I’m not even in a relationship right now. But I’ve been in them and I know what a relationship built on sand looks like.
 
The way that I describe relationships is that they are either built on sand (sand being the world) or they are built on a rock (God).
 
Now-a-days many of us don’t see a lot of relationships like our parents and grandparents. When I think of a relationship I think of my parents who spend every day together. They are each other’s best friend. I see how each of them love each other, and love their children. But most importantly I see how they love Jesus. When I walk downstairs in the morning and I see two bibles side by side at the kitchen table, I know that my parents have a relationship built on a rock. And I want that one day when Jesus has that man for me. But often now many of kids my age don’t value this. They say it’s too hard, or how do you even do that?
 
Honestly, I don’t have all the answers Im still searching myself. But what I can say is that a relationship that lasts in one where Christ is the center. It is two people putting God first before all else that this crazy life brings and seeking Him in every way possible. It’s trusting God’s plan and that He will build your relationship into one that lasts a lifetime.
 
Relationships are great right? I mean who wouldn’t want a best friend, and someone to do life with? But where are the signs of God in the relationship?
 
Ask yourself these questions: How is your relationship with God personally? Are your words and actions continually worshipping God? Are you and your partner keeping God at the center of your relationship? Are you growing closer to God, both individually and together as a couple?
 
It's hard when you and your partner are on two separate pages. I have been there, done that. It’s challenging and it’s hard, you don’t want to look at the reality but you know you have to trust God.
So let’s talk about this thing called relationship goals, a goal is this.
GOAL: the result or achievement toward which effort is directed or aimed.
The problem is that often our goals are not aimed at things that are stable. We need to have a goal that is aimed at something that is stable. So here comes another question, what is stable?
STABLE: unmoving, unchanging, and example of stable: is THE WORD OF GOD
And the standard of relationships needs to be stable, the standard of relationships needs to be the word of God. When you are in a relationship ask yourself….
DOES THAT RELATIONSHIP HELP YOU?                                                                                                   If it does…great! In what way? If it doesn’t… ask yourself where is your aim?
Something I’ve learned is that God has an order for a successful relationship.

1. BEFORE THE PERSON
2. Before you meet your right person, God has things he wants to deposit in your life. And often we choose people to deposit things in our life that only God can give us.
3. Think about what God desires to give you before he gives you that person.
4. PLACE
5. I believe God has a place where he knows PURPOSE will happen in your life.
6. Often, many of us try to place ourselves instead of allowing God to place us where he wants us to be.
7. We search and search for a place and for people to validate the place that we have chosen.
8. Think about this: God placed Adam, God placed you in your family.
9. We often as humans want to fight the place because it’s not where we think we want to be or because it’s out of our comfort zone. And then we begin to fight the people around us that have been placed around us for a PURPOSE.
10. In your place, God reveals PURPOSE
11. Know that God has put you in that place on purpose.
12. Embrace the PLACE, embrace the PURPOSE.

(Kinda like Nappanee’s slogan embrace the pace) haha okay only my fellow Nappanee folk will get that.

• And guess what?!?! YOU ARE GOING TO FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE, but guess what that brings? GROWTH

1. PROVISION
2. God will supply for us where he has called us to be.
3. Also remember that God only funds his ideas, so if you are trying to provide, first check if you are in the right place, then that you are fulfilling purpose, and remember that God makes provision grow wherever he is.
4. Identity
5. Remember to be like Jesus
6. Your identity is found in Christ. Not the clothes you wear, or in your friends, or your job. It is found in Him.
7. The enemy wants you to not know who you are, he wants you to question your identity.
8. But God is giving you your identity and God wants to use every part of you for a purpose.
9. PARAMETERS
10. God loves you more than you will ever know.
11. There is a standard before relationships so that your relationship will create a standard for you.
12. NO STANDARD + NO STANDARD = HOT MESS
13. Sure your allowed to do anything technically, but remember that not everything is beneficial.
14. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
15. Often we think that other people have the ability to place us where we need to go, and the reality is that ONLY GOD can place us exactly where we need to go.

2 Peter 1:3 – “His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by his own glory and goodness.”
We need to go through this process in order to have a stable relationship on the rock. And we need to stop focusing on the world and focus on God. In him you will find what you are looking for, and trust his plan.
If your relationship is centered on Christ and you each have that desire to grow in a relationship with Him, then both of you will feel a sense of pleasing God. You want someone who can support you in reading the Bible daily and attending church and Bible studies. You want someone who will pray with you before each meal and every night; someone who will pray for YOU. Set an example to those around you, even for your future children on what a relationship is to be: centered on Christ.
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Date someone who loves Jesus more than you. Choose to be with someone who brings out your truest identity in Christ. The right relationship won't distract you from God; it will bring you closer to Him. Ask God to give you His eyes for your partner, to show you how He sees him/her. There are no flaws but perfections; there are no downfalls but uniqueness. Looking at your partner through God’s eyes will give you a different view of what love is.

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