There hasn't been a ton of super hard times that stick out to me but there are a few moments that I vividly remember that will always been times that made me stronger.
So prepare for this post to be super real and raw.
1. THE SECRET MY PARENTS KEPT FROM ME FOR 19 YEARS
A secret say WHAT?! For real... I remember walking into my parents bedroom last year and I had never seen the look they had on their faces. At first I thought something was seriously wrong, like someone died. Then they looked at each other and back at me and calmly said Sarah we think it's time to tell you something that we have kept from you your whole life.
When you hear your parents say this your brain instantly goes to... Am I adopted?!
That wasn't the case, what was the case was the story Im about to tell. They didn't tell me this story because they never wanted me to think that it was a thought in their heads and as parents I think, they want to make sure the right message is relayed to their daughter.
Ive written on this before so if you want to read the whole story click here
Here's why I am grateful for this:
This story is a prime example of the way that God works. It shows my parents strength through a rough process that instead was graceful because my parents had the Lord at the center of it all and relied on him for everything. Im grateful that my parents told me because even though I still despise that doctor and want to send him a letter with bible verses and how incredible God is in his created of all people. I have forgiven and found grace in my heart and know that God will continue to work through me and Im sure that doctor knows what he wanted was not right.
2. THE MEME
I was on a plane to Colorado when I got a message on Facebook from a girl I went to high school with. I was surprised to say the least when she said, "Sarah I think you need to look at this"
As I opened up the link I was terrified and after what I saw I had every right to be.
The moment I saw what someone had created with a photo of me I felt my insides instantly cry for help. I was sitting by myself on the plane, a stranger next to me. I called my parents but their phones were already on airplane mode and I couldn't get their attention.
I started balling my eyes out so angry at the world and why anyone would post this. What did I ever do to them? How could someone lack so much heart? Where is kindness in this world?
You are probably wondering what the meme was... well it is extremely inappropriate so I wont post it on here but basically it was an inappropriate sexual meme of something to do with me having one arm.
I remember instantly contacting my best friend Paige and of course there she was in my worst one arm moment ready to comfort me and show me love. I am so grateful for her heart and for her understanding in these dark moments.
That plane ride was the longest plane ride of my life, or so it seemed.
When I got off the plane I ran to my dad and said dad, I don't know how to tell you this but I have a serious matter that is really bad and I don't know what to do. He didn't really know what to say either.
Here's why I'm grateful:
I am grateful because I learned that even though there are nasty, sickening, people in this world. There are people that love me more that anything that comfort me in these times. Like Paige, and my family. The internet is my friend most of the time but on this particular day it was my worst enemy. But there will always be negatives, you just have to find the positives and keep those at the top. Don't let negative people get to you. Just brush it off, it's not worth your tears or your energy.
3. THAT RUDE BOY
In high school there was this boy, I thought he was cute and I had a crush for sure. I remember we would text but one day I got told from one of his friends about a comment he made about me and my arm. Now I never had much trouble with guys and my arm but this was definitely the worst.
I wore my prosthetic to school the next day to feel "normal" I cried the night before wondering if I'd ever find a guy that loved me for me and loved my one arm life too. (I was an emotional teen, okay) hahaaha
I wont repeat what he said but when I asked him about it he owned up to what he did but the thing was, he would never say it to my face of course because he didn't have the balls to.
This is why I am Grateful:
It taught me that when I run into guys like this they obviously are NOT worth my time. And they are definitely not the right guy God has for me. It made finding guys (the right guys) easier for me. And I realized that guys are dumb and not worth the tears or my time. Those types of guys need to go back to how to be a kind man school and listen to their momma.
4. THE BULLIES
Let's just say high school my junior and senior year were rough and I have no desire to ever relive those moments.
My junior year a lot of really big things happened in my life, and this was the year I developed and decided my platform of Imperfectly Sarah. During these two years I had supporters and I had people that bullied me.
For myself it was all through social media, Twitter was a huge deal when I was in high school and people tweeted nasty comments about me. I had someone in high school tell me to go live my imperfectly perfect life and kill myself.
I told no one, and I didn't really let it affect me too much.
However what I did do was isolate myself from my peers.
This is something I don't recommend doing, because it created more bullies in the end.
This is why I am grateful:
I am grateful because it made me stronger in the end. I was able to just brush it off and not let the negativity affect me.
And I was able to use my experiences with bullying to impact the lives of so many kids in different schools and help give advice on what to do when you are bullied. Know that you are strong, you are loved, and you are NOT ALONE.
5. MISS INDIANA
During the week of Miss Indiana I was on a spiritual high with the Lord.
I learned so much.
The moment I got there I wanted to leave, I told my mom I wasn't cut out for this. All the girls were super serious about it, and most of them already knew each other. Of course there was drama, I mean you get a group of pageant girls together so I expected that.
But during the week God spoke to me more than ever.
Why I am Grateful: because God showed me that my purpose is greater than a crown on my head. My purpose wasn't meant for the process. I was able to see God at work more than ever.
It was a great reminder that God's purpose and plan for me is so much greater than my own.
Well known for her love for Jesus, coffee, and having one arm. Sarah share's stories in her life in hope to help others. She wants you to know that,
"Our differences do not define who we are but are a part of the story that God has written for our lives."
Sarah says, " I hope that I can be someone to relate to in a world of untold real stories. Everything I write is from my heart and real."
"We are all created imperfectly perfect by God, we should be proud of our imperfections and differences, they make us who we are today but do not define us, know that you are beautiful and remind yourself of this everyday."